Moscow! This was a very, very long hard day of tourism at
its worst or perhaps highest form. We got up at around 4am to be ashore by
5:30am so we would not miss the high speed Sapsan train to Moscow from St.
Petersburg. We found that breakfast was not being served anywhere onboard. This
is weird because we both thought we clearly remembered O having early breakfast
for their tour guests going to Moscow on day 2 here. But I guess that was just
collective wishful remembering. We thought because we have access to the
Concierge Lounge that we could get something there. I got a cappuccino and a
plain yogurt with a jam to flavor it and I was fine. The guy that got there 1
minute after me found the coffee machine being serviced! He was in his bathrobe
so it is unlikely he was going to try up in Horizons Lounge which is the only
other place I would know to try without calling room service. There was nothing
for Clay but some cookies left over from the evening before and that is what he
had. The only real problem with the Moscow tour was finding food to eat when
you wanted to eat. That didn’t seem possible. The good news is that since we
never had a port bag check, Clay decided to take Nabs, Oreos, and a protein
bar. We ate it all plus what we were able to find along the way. We also took 2
bottles of water off the ship before we left which was a good thing because we
had a hard time finding anyone without gas elsewhere and Alla Tours did not
provide any on this tour unlike all the others. Shortly after 5:30am we met our
tour partners for the day, Zach and Cheryl. They were from LA and were much
younger than us. They were in First Class on the train, so we only saw them
during the tour and on the transfer to and from the train. We were in Economy,
or whatever the masses use is called. Our car, 3, was filled with a large group
of Asians traveling together with a lot of luggage and it was a bit of a
nightmare. The other problem was that half the seats travel backwards at any
point in time. We were in 1 and 2 outbound on the right side and facing
backwards for 4 hours of over 200 kmh travel. Coming back the car was not as
crowded and we were in 43 and 44 again facing backwards and now on the left
side of the car so we were looking at the same side of the tracks traveling in
the opposite direction. Coming back we also had 2 stops that we didn’t have
outbound which extended the trip by about 15 minutes or more.
We arrived in Moscow about 10:25am. By the time we met our Alla
guide, sounds like E-ah, and the van picked us up it was 11am. The van reeked of cigarettes and either the
A/C didn’t work or the driver just wouldn’t turn it up. Every time one of us
complained he would touch the controls and it would get a bit cooler for a few
minutes and then it would heat up again. The temperature hovered just under 30C
according to his overhead display. E-ah asked if we had any special requests so
I asked her about a quick stop at a Starbucks if we were near one during the day.
She said no, she didn’t think so. Within the first 5 minutes in the van there
was one visible sitting at a stoplight. She apologized at the end of the tour that
we never found a Starbucks, but that I should know she remembered and that she
had told me there weren’t any. Whatever. She said no and she meant no. I just
think all 4 of us thought we had booked a private tour and that we could and
would be accommodated if possible and not just get lip service about it, but
E-ah had an itinerary and schedule in mind and she had no intention of
deviating no matter what.
We took a quick drive around Moscow as she pointed things
out at speed. I wish I could tell you our route, but Alla and E-ah provided no
tour maps or other informational handouts. E-ah told us she would at some point
show us our route on a map so we would understand where we’d been and what we’d
seen, but that never happened. Our first stop was outside the back side of the Kremlin.
We got out and walked through a park with a weird statue about the corruption
of children. Then to a bridge with lock trees on it and along a canal or river
embankment. In the distance we could see a huge weird statue honoring Peter the
Great that looked like Peter Pan on a flying pirate ship. Our next stop was at
Moscow Cathedral where we walked all the way around and through it on an
extensive tour that was not listed on our program. We spent at least an hour
between these 2 stops and we have no idea why really. The cathedral was a 1994
recreation of the one that historically stood there and was blown up under
orders to Stalin. E-ah said there had been a swimming pool there most of her
life without a word about the old church or Stalin until construction and fund
raising started to remove the pool and rebuild it. When she was asked by Zach
why we spent all this time on things no one requested and were not on the
itinerary she never really answered him. I have to assume because that was what
she wanted to do for whatever reason. Next stop was at the ski jumps for a look
at them, the University and a view over the city. This was on the itinerary as “City
introduction tour incl. KGB headquarters.” When E-ah was asked about it, she
said she did point out KGB headquarters when we drove by it. I agreed that at speed
among 100 other things she did point it out, but that didn’t explain why it was
featured in our programs. She said she didn’t know why either because it is
closed to the public, not an open place. It was misleading and frustrating at
best. Anyway, at 1:15pm the van left us for good in front of the Bolshoi
Theater. The program had this part of the day lasting until 2:30pm. But there
was no arguing with gather your belongings and don’t leave anything behind
because this is where we part with our driver. Now this was not spelled out on the
program at all. I should note that later I saw canal boats and thought to
myself that would be better than the van for less than 2 hours and on foot for
the rest of the day. Our guide today (Saturday) asked us about our day in
Moscow and told us the best way to see Moscow in a single day is from the HOHO
river/canal boats. He confirmed what we did was the worst. We were never
offered anything else and didn’t know. We trusted Alla to only offer the best
and we were mistaken. We walked around to glimpse what we would be seeing the
rest of the afternoon. We were all pretty hot, bothered and annoyed by then and
ready to see something that we had come for instead of circling it first by van
and now on foot. E-ah said we had timed entry tickets and we needed to have our
lunch stop now. She led us to a walking district/outdoor mall food court and into
Sbarro. She promised me my long awaited toilet stop there. Alas, it was not to
be. The restrooms were out of service, they had no still water, etc. We ate
there but Zach gave E-ah a good tongue lashing about it. She was unrepentant and
said this is where she always brings her tours. She did lead us directly to
public restrooms after about a 30-minute meal. Then we finally entered the
Kremlin and crossed Red Square, but this was not our photo stop which
frustrated everyone again. We walked all the way around the Kremlin Palace and through
Cathedral Square and heard all about every building as we did. Then we got in
line at the Armory. This was our timed entry ticket. It was on our program as “Excursion
in Kremlin: Cathedrals and Armory Chamber (tsars regalia, diplomatic gifts,
Faberge eggs)”. This sounded interesting. It was overwhelming. We had traveled
hundreds of miles and walked a few more and now we were on a speed walk of
endless, mind numbing details. I appreciated the effort, but it was too much. Zach
just wanted to see Red Square. I just wanted to see St. Basil’s on Red Square.
No. E-ah had to show us the cathedrals. All 3. Each and every one with a full
history and details pointed out. I was ready to weep. I don’t know how the others
felt but it was not a happy group. After the Tsar’s bell, she led us to Red
Square and Zack perked up. We were all happy to see St. Basil’s. It is too bad
we couldn’t go in there, since of all the 4 churches that we had to tour none
of had ever heard of them while St. Basil’s is iconic of Moscow and I know it
is what I was expecting. Anyway, she led us to GUM, now a shopping mall and insisted
we go inside so she could show us our meeting point in one hour. Zach balked and
told her he could find a fountain in a mall. Off they went, to an outdoor bar/café
that she could see. We let her lead us to the fountain and point out her
suggestions for us in the mall. We took them. We went through the grocery store
and bought Clay a sandwich for the train ride back. We had some delicious ice
cream and a frozen Coke each. We used the restroom and sat around on the edge
of Red Square and then our hour was up. At 6:30pm, we left Red Square and started
our tour of subway stations back to the train station. (This is the problem
with our itinerary. It did not indicate that we’d only have transportation for
less than 2 hours and walk and subway our way back to the train station!)
Anyway, on Friday of a Russian holiday weekend at 6:30pm, we started our public
transit commute across Moscow. I don’t know how it could have been any more
crowded. It was interesting to see the richly decorated stations. E-ah got us
back in time to walk right onboard the train and take our seats with little
wait for departure. I am glad I got to see Moscow. But, I wouldn’t recommend anyone
repeat this experience. It could certainly be done better. Our train tickets
cost about $100 pp according to Clay’s translation of our tickets. That means
that we think we actual tour cost was about $580 pp. That was outlandish for
what we got compared to here in St. Petersburg.
We got back after midnight and the passport control and
guards were jovial for the first and only time! We were in bed and asleep by
1am with an alarm set to wake us by 7:30am on Saturday.
